The Most Surprising Thing That Nearly Broke Me in the ICU

Oddly enough, the extreme boredom drove me crazier than the immense and constant pain.

It May Sound Nice… But…

For me, the coma was the easy part. I simply went to sleep one day and, 24 days later, woke up.

Granted I suffered nightmarish hallucinations that still plague my mind even 7 years later.

You can read about almost all of them in my book.

But the struggles for those 24 days were all with my beautiful Felicia who stayed with me, defended me from poor medical decisions and panicking family, and kept faith that I would survive.

My struggles started after day 24.

There were a lot of issues in the week after waking up.

• Having intubation removed and gasping for air.
• Being paralyzed and defenseless while seeing horror movie style things happening around me.
• Having multiple procedures done to fix various issues I was having.
• The fear that came with the list of “never agains” they kept giving me.

But there was one thing they couldn’t possibly have prepared me for.

The Mind Numbing Boredom

I know some people have it worse. But imagine waking every day to:

• The same exact room
• The same exact people
• Not even being able to change channels
• No food
• Inability to hold a book
• No strength to use a phone

My days were laying in a bed, staring straight ahead… and that’s about it.

Granted, there were some exciting moments each day.

• A lady would come in to do x-rays… and then I would crash.
• The physical therapist would come in… and then I would crash.
• They would come twice daily to take blood… and then I would crash.
• Speech therapy would work with my throat… and then I would crash.

It reached a point that I would get excited when a doctor would come in the room or when someone came to take blood.

At least there was a new face to make small talk with.

The boredom got so strong that one morning I remember waking up and looking at my sweet wife. We smiled, sat a moment, and then both started to cry.

Remember, I was in there for 52 days. There was simply nothing left to talk about. So we just sat and cried.

A Warning And Reminder

As with all of my writing, I don’t tell you this so that you’ll have pity on me. I am FAR beyond all of that.

I write and remind others so that you can think of your loved ones… those around you who may find themselves in a similar situation.

The ICU can drive you crazy and, believe it or not, your face and conversation may feel like a godsend to those who have been isolated for so long.

It sure did feel like a godsend for me. So long as I didn’t see my guests as a torturer coming to harvest my organs… But that’s a story for another time.

Thank you all for your time. My wild story is selling more and more and I love the fact that its getting out there where it may do some good.

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